True Confessions of a Food Reformer: First Course

This blog is about my family, and I've realized that there is one big part of our family that I haven't posted about here. It's food. Ever since our oldest daughter was born with food allergies, what we're going to eat is what I think about when I wake up every morning and what keeps me up at night. As we've added more kids and more allergies to the clan that responsibility has grown as fast as my kids do - most days I can hardly keep up! Since it's such a factor in my everyday, it's about time I start sharing some of what I'm learning.

Though we've dealt with food allergies for the better part of the last 14 years,  it was about three years ago that my concern for my family's health really skyrocketed. Among the 5 of us we struggled with everything from food intolerances, chronic stomach aches, and hypoglycemia, to ADHD, eczema and skin irritations, and my high-risk pregnancy, just for starters. I was thoroughly overwhelmed. Trying to sort through the "ifs" and "whats"of each situation had my head spinning and while I was appreciative of the medications available to help alleviate some of our symptoms, I felt uneasy relying solely on them when I wasn't clear about the roots of our problems.

I waded through websites, appointments, specialists, conversations, and trial-and-error phases and I didn't seem to be getting anything but more overwhelmed. Finally one morning, after yet another visit to the corner pharmacy, I came to a breaking point. Weighed down with discouragement and fraught with good old genuine worry, I sat in the parking lot and cried. Hey, I was pregnant, remember? Even so, I simply did not know what to do. I didn't know all the answers and I didn't know how to find them. I sat there asking, "How am I supposed to fix all these problems when I don't really even understand them?"Then it came to me. Maybe I didn't understand all the medical ins and outs of our needs, but I did understand food. I understood that wholesome, simple, healthy food is better than processed food, and that the more nutrients a body receives from food, the more equipped that body is to grow and heal.

As soon as I considered that concept the more obvious the solution became to me - we needed to change the way we were eating. The time had come for an honest evaluation of our family diet and I didn't like what I saw. When my oldest was at the height of her food allergy reactions I made nearly everything we ate from scratch and monitored every ingredient. She later outgrew most of those allergies, coincidentally the same time I began struggling with an autoimmune condition. I considered it a huge relief to be able to rely on frozen foods, boxed foods, and take-out to keep my family full when my inflammation and fatigue had me down for the count. Later, even though my condition improved, carpool, homework, and after-school activities swallowed up my time and quick-fix meals continued to dominate my menus. Sitting in that pharmacy parking lot that day I realized I had drifted too far from our home cooked "allergy" diet and it was time to correct course. Maybe I couldn't fix every health problem we had but I could fix healthy, wholesome meals and start from there.

Although I was absolutely convinced we needed to make some changes, I wasn't ready to wage a full-scaled food revolution overnight. Let's face it, my kids were not going to go from frozen pizza to fresh peas without a fight. I had to decide what my goals were and how to break them down into a series of gradual changes. My objective would be to rid our meals of processed foods and replace them with homemade meals made from whole grains, natural meats, and organic produce. We also needed a serious reduction in our sugar consumption.

The first thing I did was talk the whole plan over with my husband. Change like this had to be a combined effort and I needed a co-captian to help me ward off mutiny from the crew. He was fully on board, so I charted course and set sail. My plan included re-introducing fruits and vegetables to our meals, learning more about food sources, transitioning pre-made foods out of our diet, adding new, whole grains to menu, and cutting down sugar.

I'll elaborate more on each phase of the plan in detail later, but I can tell you right now the common theme for me in this endeavor has been learn, learn, learn. When we started down this road I felt like it was me against the world. It seemed like everywhere I looked there was food within reach, but not the wholesome meals I was grasping for. I considered one meal, or one item in one meal a success if it met the criteria of our new diet and my family ate it willingly. I've since built up a repertoire of recipes, one by one, and I'm more efficient in preparing them. There are still busy days, sick days, lazy days, and fun days where we find ourselves in the drive-thru line or at the mercy of the pizza delivery man, but those days are the exception, not the norm. Our "new diet" is no longer a novelty, but is simply "the way we eat."

Two years after our food reform began our allergy sufferers were suffering less, our eczema and skin irritations decreased,  and we started sleeping better. My husband combined his food choices with consistent exercise and lost nearly 40 pounds. We've made more changes since then, and we're still working to improve. Improving our meals also improved our mealtime. We spend more time in the kitchen together, and my children are learning to really cook. More importantly they are learning to choose foods that will give their bodies a better shot at being healthy. I'm not claiming to know all the answers but I've come a long way from that teary eyed day in the parking lot. Now instead of feeling helpless I feel that I'm helping; helping our family become stronger, healthier, and fuller in more ways than one.

I really appreciate all the recipes and information I've collected from other people along the way, so I'm going to start using this blog as my shout out to the other allergy moms out there, and anyone else who needs some food strategy reinforcement now and then. Recipes will follow soon, and in the meantime, carry on warriors!

Traditions

When I was growing up we had a tradition where my mom helped us each make gifts for our grandparents and family. It was a lot of work for her to come up with something for each of us to do and then help us make them but she stuck it out. I still remember some of the gifts that I made; yarn angels, stenciled doilies, cross-stitched ornaments, and woven letter holders. Even more I remember that I felt important when we visited my grandparents and some of the things I made were on display.

Now I try to help my kids make small gifts for my grandparents and my parents. Thanks to the internet it's not too hard coming up with ideas, but it's a little bit of a job to try and get them done. We enjoy it though, and it's one of the many times when I ask myself, "How did my mom do this with so many of us??" In past years we've done snowflake sun-catchers, tissue paper candle holders, chocolate covered pretzels, different kinds of felt ornaments, and cinnamon sachets to name a few. This year I worked our gift making tradition into one of our Sunday afternoon activities. Each child received a gift bag and in it was a kit with all the supplies to make a gift for their great-grandmother.

Madeleine etched an original design onto a glass cup and added sparkles to make a candle holder. Beth pieced together a hot pad made from Christmas fabric. Mary stitched a heart shaped ornament with yarn on plastic canvas, and Gabe glued red, white, and green pompoms to a paper candy cane. I was so intent on finishing and wrapping the gifts I forgot to take a picture of the completed items, but they turned out cute. Madeleine was especially gracious when, after she spent hours working on a custom design for her candle holder, I dropped it in the driveway while I was carrying the gifts into the house and it shattered before anyone opened it. I felt so bad but she forgave me and said she didn't want everyone to see it anyway:)

Some time in the 80's the Dollar Store came to be and a new tradition was born for us kids. My mom took us there to do our Christmas shopping for each other and we would all run around with our coats covering our baskets and trying to avoid each other in the aisles. You may not think it, but some of the most appropriate gifts only cost 100 pennies. For example, one year my brother gave me a bottle of hairspray - if you were around in the 80's you know why I appreciated that. Another brother gave me a paperback cookbook that I still have and in it is the recipe for one of my husband's favorite desserts. When I was in college my brother gave me a pizza pan and I still cook pizza on one just like it. Then there was the pair of zebra striped leggings that didn't quite fit me but somehow managed to make an appearance in a high school skit...and I wasn't the one wearing them.

Now I take my kids to the Dollar store every December and they scurry around with coat-covered baskets, whispering to each other and then avoiding each other while they pick out presents for everybody. One year they gave me a photo album, "because you take so many pictures," and a notebook because, "you're always saying, 'I need to write that down'." Last year I got a calendar of lighthouse photos to remind me of my favorite places on the east coast. This year I got a collection of angel figurines and the one from Beth is playing the violin since she started violin lessons this year. The kids pass out their dollar store and homemade gifts for us all on Christmas Eve.  It's my favorite part of Christmas.

Every year December gets busier and busier and sometimes some of our traditions get put aside for next year, and sometimes new traditions evolve as our family grows and changes. There are some I won't let go of though because they mean something to me beyond finding a fun way to celebrate.

When speaking of family traditions Elder Donald L. Hallstrom said:

"Traditions, established patterns of behavior transmitted from generation to generation, are an inherent part of culture. Our culture and its related traditions help establish our sense of identity and fill the vital human need to belong.

Of traditions which are complementary to the gospel of Jesus Christ, Paul admonished the Thessalonians, “Therefore, … stand fast, and hold the traditions which ye have been taught” (2 Thes. 2:15). ... traditions remind us of the strength and sacrifice of our ancestors and inspire our efforts."

( Cultivate Righteous Traditions, General Conference, Oct. 2000)

I feel very blessed to have fond memories of positive family traditions and I'm grateful for the continuity and unity that they brought into our family growing up. It's truly a pleasure to pass them on to my own children and to create memories with traditions of our own. I think the opportunity to do so during Christmas is one of the many gifts this season brings. What are your favorite traditions? I'd love to hear.

The Man Who Saved Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas for our family crew,
and we were all on the couch, sick with the flu.
Our fevers were raging and we were coughing real bad. 
The only ones still standing were Madeleine and Dad. 

Mom tried to make dinner like she'd planned in her head,
But Dad intervened and sent her to bed.
He called for Madeleine and they went to the store. 
They got everyone's favorite foods and a little bit more.

They laid out a picnic and turned a great movie on.
The kids started smiling and so did their mom.
After the show we gave gifts to each other.
We sang Christmas carols one after another.

We read of the star and how angels sang,
Of the wise men that traveled, and the shepherds that came.
We read of the Savior and how through His birth
Came salvation and joy to all people on earth. 

We may have been sick and been feeling real bad,
But Christmas was saved, thanks to our Dad. 
He came our rescue, he made everything right.
Christmas was merry for all and we all had a good night. 

It's a true story. The kids and I were too sick to do anything but move from the couch to our beds and back again on Christmas Eve, but Luke and Madeleine took care of everything and we had a nice cozy evening at home together. It's the only Christmas morning that I insisted on taking everyone's temperatures before we went downstairs but, aside from the fevers, the morning went off without a hitch. After we all "Advilled up" we pulled ourselves together enough to enjoy the afternoon with Luke's family.

Opening their gifts to each other

 Christmas Eve pajamas

 Reading with Dad

 Christmas morning before...

 During...

 and after

 Mary made sure Santa got his cookies, and it looks like he enjoyed them!

I hope you all had a great Christmas and wish you a happy, healthy New Year.

It Wouldn't Be Christmas...

Without kids wearing tinsel and towels on their heads.

 Our church held a nice Christmas dinner and all the kids participated in a nativity complete with costumes, props, and singing. Gabe was a star but insisted he was a shepherd so that's what we had to call him to get him into his costume. Beth and Mary were angels and they sang like it.

After the dinner and program a special visitor showed up to surprise the kids. Mary was too shy to sit on his lap but was still willing to whisper what she wanted for Christmas.

 Gabe wasn't shy at all and told Santa he wanted a Spider Man toy, an iron man costume, a Superman and an airplane.

When he hopped down he looked at his candy cane and then said bewildered, "He didn't give it to me mom. I told him what I wanted but he didn't give it to me." A friend standing with me knealt down and explained that the way it works is we tell Santa what we want, he brings it when we're asleep on Christmas Eve, and when we wake up Christmas morning, there it is! Gabe listened wide-eyed and then said, "Awwwwesoooome!" He was content with his candy cane after that.

It was a really nice event and a lot of people did a lot of work to make it happen. We're lucky to be able to celebrate with great friends and neighbors.