Thursday, October 28, 2010

For Grandma and Grandpa: two weeks


We went for his two week check-up and he measured in at 8 lbs 13 oz and 20."
I let Aunt Lynn, Super Nurse, be the bad guy who held him down for shots and I did the cuddling afterwards. He had his first bath before we left and he and I slept a lot after we got home. Lynn is taking good care of us and we are all doing well.








Saturday, October 16, 2010

One Week and Wide-Eyed

One week already. The days went by so fast and yet life before Gabe was here already seems far away. He has been all the joy we thought he would be, and then some. His sisters are completely smitten and never miss an opportunity to hold him, kiss him, or help care for him. It is delightful to watch them surround their brother with such enthusiastic love. Luke hasn't left my side all week. He has done EVERYTHING involving the girls and the house so that I didn't have to lift a finger and I am recovering well because of it, but just having him home has been a strength and a comfort in itself. I've been living in a bliss-filled bubble and though "real life" is bound to catch up with me soon, I expect to keep floating. There's not much that could bring me down with these eyes looking up at me!










Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Friday, September 24, 2010

All We Need Now...




Is the baby! The room is ready (aside from hanging a few pictures), the clothes are washed, and the bag is packed so now we wait. We're scheduled to be induced on October 9, which happens to be my birthday, and I can't decide if two weeks from tomorrow feels very soon or still so far away. In the meantime the girls are getting more and more excited.
When Beth walked in and saw what used to be her room all done up in blue and brown she gasped in delight and stared for a while. Later I heard high pitched squeals coming from in there when she opened the closet door and found all his tiny clothes. She visits the room almost daily to rock in the chair or lay on the bed. I'm not sure if she's wanting to be in her old room for awhile or if she does it to feel close to the baby, or both. She is convinced that when she talks to my tummy the baby hears her and does what she says. For example last night she said good night to him and told him not to kick so hard that I wouldn't sleep. This morning she asked how I slept and when I said I slept well she grinned, "See, I told him not to keep you up!"
Mary is planinng to feed him his bottle if he cries while I am making dinner and Beth said she would hold him and just practice her spelling words and math problems out loud if he wants to be held during homework time. Madeleine has become my right hand and a tremendous help already. Yes, these "little mothers" are ready to be involved, although I haven't heard much volunteering for diaper duty :) I'm ready for some quiet snuggle time and I think Dad is ready for a little sports buddy.
I hope this little boy is ready to be loved, doted on, and fought over, because we're ready for him!


Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Good Books For Girls?

Reading has always been a favorite past time of mine, and it's one of my favorite things to share with my children. I love to read to them and I love to see them love to read. Madeleine is an insatiable enthusiasts whereas for Beth it's currently more of a love/hate relationship (but it's coming around, slowly but surely!) and Mary is surprisingly willing to sit and listen when good stories, especially funny ones, are concerned.
This summer we developed a sophisticated, cutting edge family reading incentive program- a plastic jar and bowl of pom-poms. One pom-pom goes in the jar for every book someone in the family reads and when it is full...(drum roll please)... we go on a "family date" to the book store and each child is allowed to pick out a new book. Truth be told I neglected to determine an estimate of the number of pom-poms needed to fill that jar prior to launching the program. Had I employed such foresight, I can tell you I would've purchased larger pom-poms. It is likely that our summer reading program will extend far into the Fall before the jar is filled, but I am completely ok with that. It doesn't really matter when it gets filled, so long as it does.
In order to keep the fire burning until we achieve our lofty goal I am in need of LOTS of good reading material over the next few months and finding the right balance of interest and content is no easy feat for this crowd. Nothing too scary, too tense, or suspenseful, so mystery is out as well as science fiction and most fantasy (believe it or not, it's only the parents and not the children who have devoured Harry Potter in this household). Our avid readers are prone to vivid nightmares. Since many a night of sleep has been lost after one spooky story or dramatic movie scene, we tread carefully when making our media selections. Nothing too mean-spirited, bully-ish, or sarcastic. Our more sensitive and empathetic readers are easily disenchanted by such characters. The Diary of a Wimpy kid was closed before it was ever started around here. Nothing too boy-crazy, trendy, or faddish. Hannah Montana has her place, but it's not in my read-aloud bedtime books. It's all I can do to keep her TV show and her music from driving me bonkers.
Madeleine's been through Little House on the Prairie, Anne of Green Gables, and the Louisa May Alcott collection. Magic Tree House, the Pet/Rainbow/Weather/Jewel Fairies series have all been done, and so have Amber Brown, Cam Jansen, and Animal Ark. We have refused to let the Pigeon Drive the Bus and heard the demands of typing cows and superior ducks multiple times, while somehow Piggie and Elephant never fail to get a laugh no matter how many times we read the same story. Even so, summer is half over and we've got about 467 pom-poms to go.
So ladies (and gentlemen if that shoe fits), what do you suggest? I'm interested in your input on everything from picture books to early readers to (5th grade appropriate) novels and great family read-alouds. Do you have favorite audio books for long car rides? We've got a five-hour journey coming up and we'd love the company of your good friends. Funny, sentimental, or classic; what's your favorite, both past and present? I'd be grateful for your suggestions. In fact, for every worthy recommendation, we'll name a pom-pom after you.

Monday, May 31, 2010

It's a Boy!!

Yes, it's true. We are having a boy. Every time I make that statement I have the feeling that our world is about to enter a new dimension altogether unlike anything we have previously experienced in our realm of parenting. It's like we're being inaugurated into a club that we didn't know existed.

As we anticipated finding out the gender of our baby I was honestly 50/50. At times I would envision Luke enjoying father/son outings and imagine a little buddy tagging along with me like my younger brothers used to do. My heart melted at the thought of a little guy coming to join us. Then I would remember tiny pink bows and dainty dresses and sweet little giggles and I would long to have a baby girl all over again. So despite having all girls already, I really didn't have a preference.

Even while we waited in the waiting room at the imaging center I tried to imagine them telling me one way and then the other, just to test how I would really feel when I heard the final word. Finally, logic prevailed and I decided, "It's a girl. It's always a girl. Every time we do this I get all antsy about finding out what it's going to be and every time they say it's a girl." A cloud of pink flooded my mind. I got giddy at the thought of embroidered flowers and was overcome by an urge to unpack all the little dresses I still have stashed away. Grinning widely as they called our names I practically skipped back to imaging room. We chatted with the technician for a minute and then black and white blotches filled the screen in front of us. One look and before the technician could say anything I blurted out, "It IS a boy!!!" I was genuinely surprised and somewhat bewildered. I remember looking at Luke with a feeling of something like, "Well...what do we do now?" On the drive home we talked about names, redecorating, scouting, and even preparing him to serve an LDS mission, trying to take in all the new concepts and responsibilities that will become a part of our family life.

A boy. Half the time I still can't believe I'm even pregnant. The fact that he's a boy seems something like the icing on the cake at this whole surprise party. So far I don't feel a strong inclination to start accumulating baby things. In fact I'm more inclined to avoid it. I haven't been motivated to shop and or felt really drawn to little boy clothes. It's not an unattractive idea for me because he's a boy. It's because he's not here. I don't want clothes and cribs and car seats. I want a BABY. I want that moment when I am holding him and his warm fuzzy head is against my cheek and I know that he is ok and so am I and nothing else matters except that he is here. A conglomeration of unused items sitting idly in an empty room seems more like a taunting reminder of how long this whole process really takes rather than a confirmation that it is really happening. Why do that to myself?

Well, because he's a BOY, and he is coming to a home that is inundated with ruffles, sparkles, and every shade of pink imaginable. Really, there is not a blue item or even a gender-neutral tone in this entire house. He's going to get here sometime and when he does we ought to have something for him to wear, and having a few diapers around would probably prove beneficial too. Therefore, let the nesting begin...

So little baby, I will try to be patient over the next 20 weeks while we wait for you to grow. I will not complain that you are taking too long. I will not worry that something will interfere between now and that moment when you are completely mine. I will not get teary looking at your empty bed wishing I could already lay you in it. Instead I will busily create a baby haven of blue and beige without a single lace ruffle or bow. And then finally, we will welcome you home, and you will always be our little boy.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Got Gas?

Three times yesterday I thought I should stop for gas and didn't do it. Then this morning my empty light went on while I was driving to a doctor's appointment. Seeing it reminded me that I left my purse at home so I ran home, grabbed the purse, and hurried to get gas. So hurried that when I heard the pump shut off I didn't realize it was the pump next to me and not mine until after I pulled the nozzle out and sprayed my new shirt and the only pants that currently fit with gasoline. I had to drive to the doctor's with all the windows down despite that it was snowing because the fumes made my morning sickness even sicker. At the doctor's I tried to wash up in the public restroom - never a satisfactory experience, and I sat through the appointment with my coat zipped up all the way and my stinky shirt rolled up in my purse. Thank goodness no one lit a cigarette within 10 feet of me before I could shower and change. If only I'd gotten gas yesterday...

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Expecting the Unexpected

They say the best surprises come in small packages. Our package measures about an inch and 1/2 , is around 9 weeks along, and is due approximately October 15! Yes, we are happily expecting again. This wasn't an opportunity that we thought we would have again given some health challenges that I've had the past few years, but I have been doing very well lately and it appears that the powers that be considered it well enough to bless us with another baby. We are all excited for this new dimension of our family life.
Mary talks to my tummy daily giving play-by-play accounts to the baby, "You're in the swimming pool baby. You're soaking wet." "Mom is eating baby. Here comes your food!" "You have the seat belt over you baby. You're safe in there." She consistently refers to the baby as "he." When Luke stopped her and asked, "Are you sure it's a 'he,' or could it be a girl?" she replied, "Oh no dad. I am DEFINITELY sure it's a boy...maybe." Beth and Madeleine like to follow along with the week-by-week development. At week 9 we read, 'This week your baby is the size of a grape," and Beth noted, "Don't grapes come in all different sizes??" She would like to name the baby something that starts with a B so she won't be the only one without an M name anymore, and favors "Bonnie" if it's a girl. Madeleine is admittedly apprehensive about having more little people around here ("Two little sisters can be hard enough!") but she is a good sport, a great helper, and already in love with the baby.
Meanwhile, I can track a scent like a bloodhound, gag on my favorite foods, and feel like I could sleep 12 hours a day at least if only the day would let me. Nothing but perfectly normal bizarre behaviors for this stage of the game, and Luke is taking very good care of me. On my better days I enjoy complimenting myself on such achievements as managing to get to the bank AND the grocery store in the same day. On my bad days I am grateful to have a good reason for a bad day.
I marvel at the wisdom with which Heavenly Father guides our lives. So often I am certain that I know what I need, believing that I am in charge around here, and He patiently albeit sometimes painfully reminds me that He knows a little bit more about the grand scheme of things than I do. I trust Him, and I thank Him for having blessed me with the things I need and want the most, just when I least expected it.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Happy Valentines Day



Our Valentine's celebration had three lovely phases this year. On Friday morning the girls giddily pranced to school loaded with Valentine cards and treats to share, and came home laden with more cards and treats than they knew what to do with. I love to see them excited about holidays and traditions!
On Saturday, flowers arrived at the door and mom and dad went out for a gourmet Italian dinner followed by visiting with friends at the church dance (which is more of a social for non-dancers like us:). I love being with Luke no matter what we are doing, and I love that we're in love.
On actual Valentine's Day we had our first ever family dinner in the dining room and even took some of the formal china out of the original wedding-gift packaging for the occasion. The girls each received a kit for growing an amaryllis with a heart shaped card that said, "We love watching you grow," from mom and dad. I love being home together as a family. Pot-luck dessert with cousins followed at the Spangler's house that evening and according to one little person, the basement was "exploding with kids." I love that we have cousins so close by and so much family to share fun times with.
Monday was President's Day (and no longer officially part of our Valentine's celebration, but still lovely all the same) and there was no school, so we spent the day at home relaxing, decorated our flower pots and planted our amaryllis bulbs, and ended the day with a "pizza-picnic" in the family room while watching "Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs." The kids liked it, although Beth was put out that it deviated from the book:) I love having a day off now and then to spend however we want.
Sure, I totally blew my diet and the house is a mess and I'm still picking up candy wrappers, but after a weekend full of doing things I love with the people I love, how can I not love Valentine's Day?

PS. I love this picture


Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Making "Melonade" (October, 2009)

I've decided to start a separate blog to chronicle our "adventures" with Beth having dyslexia. There's only one post so far - I've got a lot of catching up to do. Feel free to read along at http://adventuresofadyslexiamom.blogspot.com


Monday, February 1, 2010

One Day

One day I lay looking out at the sleeting gray sky listening to you coughing from the other room.
What will we do on a day like today, with no sunshine, no friends, no going out to play?
If only we could get away, somewhere warm with lots of sun, where you could run.
We could leave today.

One day to get there, one day to play, one day to come home.
Is it really it worth it for just one day? Yes, it is.
On the plane, on the way, with you beside me. Coloring, singing, holding hands, playing games, watching movies. This is actually fun, to have you here by me on the plane today.

Here we are. Lots of colored lights, the ocean rolling to the shore, all of us together in our room.
And now it's morning, a brand new day. A day with no hurrying and no homework. A day with no rushing and no time table. A day with no coughing and no crying. A day to feel the sand, smell the ocean, hear you squeal, and see you smile. Just you and me and the sun and the sand and the pool, all day.

One more frolic in the ocean, one more splash in the pool, then hop in the shower. We're going home today. Back on the plane you sleep on my shoulder. I hold hands with your dad. I watch you play your games and you sing so loud the people near us smile. Home so soon, but it seems a little easier now. And in my heart I hold your smile, and the warmth, and the fun to look back on fondly one day.

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Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Our Little Jaunt to the ER

Last Monday Beth was feeling a smidge under the weather so I let her stay home from school. We spent the day together reading, cooking, sewing on her embroidery kit, and learning to knit. Before we knew it, it was time to pick-up her sisters from school, and as we drove home an argument broke out among the girls. Using story telling as an argument dispelling tactic I told them all about the time their 4 year old Uncle Tim put a fine-tipped crochet hook in his waist band to use as a Peter-Pan sword and jumped off the bed. I described how I found him laying on the floor crying with the needle poking into his leg, and how after we got it out he told me a funny story. That's what my English Lit textbook would call foreshadowing . . .

Only an hour later Beth jumped down from the counter, yelped, and whimpered, "Something is stuck in my foot." Absolutely not worried, I took a look and saw a needle poking out of Beth's sock. (Funny, I was just talking about this kind of thing) Figuring it was just stuck in the flesh of her big toe I gave it tug but it didn't budge. I gave it a yank and it still didn't budge. Perplexed, I eased off her sock, took a good look at her foot, and discovered the needle 1) had entered her big toe blunt/eye end first and 2) was all the way through her toe and bulging up on the other side. (Oooo, this is not your average splinter). My mind immediately reverted to my first aid text book:

Puncture Wound
- do not try to remove object. Doing so may create further internal damage and start excessive bleeding. (Oh, right. Oops. Well, it's her toe, not her eyeball, and I didn't get it out anyway so let's move on.)
- to prevent shock prop victim's feet up slightly and cover victim with a blanket (Madeleine dispatched to fetch necessary pillows and blankets. Shock prevention - check.)
- Stabilize impaled object with rolled gauze and wrap with gauze bandages to secure in place and prevent movement during transport. (Hmmmm. I don't happen to have any rolled gauze or bandages readily on hand and I can't very well go rummage some up seeing as how I'm currently holding my wailing, thrashing child in a scissor lock on the kitchen floor. Now what?)

The phone was in reach so I dialed 911, calmly explained the nature of the injury and asked what would be the best way to stabilize her foot so I could move her. The response was, "Don't move her and we'll send someone out to help you." Easy enough.

After a moment Beth begged to be moved to the couch (I know, 911 said not to move her but it's her toe, not her neck for heaven's sake). She was really crying and hyperventilating a bit and I wanted to get her comfortable so Madeleine helped me lift her to the couch. We settled her on the pillows, covered her with a blanket, and said a little prayer at her request. Then she started shivering uncontrollably and her teeth began to chatter. (What? Are you going in to shock? But I put a blanket on you!)

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and help came filing in. "Someone" turned out to be a full size fire truck, an ambulance, and 5 paramedics. (Oh my. There has been a bit of an exaggeration here. Certainly half of you will leave right away). I expected only two would hang around for a minute and either pull the needle out or wrap her foot and hand her over to me to take the ER. Nope. One glance at Beth and they went into action. One kept talking to her and taking her vitals, one kept her pinned down, one wrapped her foot (Yep, rolled gauze and bandages - I should really get some of those), one asked me a dozen questions, and one was on the phone calling in the incident. (This seems like a lot of precautionary, preventative, standard procedure. It's just a needle in her toe, not a car accident!)

Once she was wrapped and ready they determined she should go in the ambulance to the hospital (Really? An ambulance is bound to be expensive. But, I guess if you call 911 maybe a ride in the ambulance comes with the deal so I shouldn't argue). They asked me more questions and gave me a minute to make arrangements for my other kids. Concerned neighbors were waiting outside and my sister-in-law was already on the way so that was no problem. (I'd better change out of my house-cleaning T-shirt and put on a sweater and some lipstick. I'm bound to be asked all kinds of 'what sort of mother leaves needles on the floor and lets her kid jump off the counter' questions. I should at least try to look like I've got my act together...) Ok., time to go.

Once loaded in the ambulance, the paramedic turned on the heart rate monitor and gave Beth oxygen (these gentlemen are very thorough. It must be a slow night) He gave Beth some pain medication and kept asking her questions. That's when I finally clued in that it was hardly Beth's toe they were worried about. She was one upset, uncomfortable, frightened little girl and, bless his heart, the paramedic scrounged all over the unit looking for a stuffed animal for her to hold. She was gripping onto me with both hands and crying and asking for daddy. After she talked to him for bit on my cell phone, she started asking for for the next best thing; Grandpa. Talking with him helped take her mind off of her foot until we could get to the hospital where Daddy was waiting.

The next four hours were a snail-paced swirl of doctors, nurses, crayons, x-rays, Disney channel, orthopedics, cell phone games, stories, and finally an IV for sedation and antibiotics (cha-ching, cha-ching). After hours of discomfort and distress Beth was broken out in a rash, fitful, and inconsolable and Luke and I were so anxious to get the IV going I even called my nurse of a sister to ask what would be the most tactful way to request we get this show on the road. However, when the team arrived to provide relief Beth took one look at the IV needle and hit the roof. They talked her down, restrained her, and promised if she started counting she would be asleep before she got to 10. She counted to 19 before she stopped and even then she was still grabbing at the IV trying to pull it out. It took 3 people to hold her down and 5 doses to get her under before one of the doctors produced a pair of pliers and pulled the needle out (Why didn't I think of that? Then we could've avoided all of this...Not really. I would never have done that. I think. Yeah, she's really better off here. I should never do that).

She was so loopy coming out of the drugs I couldn't help laughing and taking a little video. Then she got to have some juice and go home. When we walked in the door I took a look around the house. Coats, shoes, and backpacks littered the front hallway. Playdough and crayons covered the kitchen table from one end to the other and underneath it. After school snack was still strewn across the counter and three meals worth of dishes were piled in the sink. (Of all days to bring in the neighbors, the family, and fire brigade! I suppose if someone were going to choose today to determine me an unfit mother, sweater verses t-shirt would hardly do much to plead my case. Wait. What's that glimmering on the rug? Another needle! And there's another - WHERE ARE THESE THINGS COMING FROM!?!?!?) There was a hole in the needle packet we were using earlier that day. We will be more careful about that kind of thing from now on.

I was so sorry Luke had to spend a late evening at the hospital the night before he had to catch an early flight, but so glad that he was still in town when it happened. The girls and I slept in the next morning and Beth stayed home from school, again. I imposed a "shoes on at all times" rule until I had scoured the house entirely and all needles were accounted for. Now we are all tidied, swept, vacuumed, washed, dried, and everyone's toes are still attached. Beth limped a little that day and returned to school in full form the day after that.

As I sat in that not-very comfortable hospital chair waiting with Beth I thought about two things. First of all, my heart went out to every parent who has, was, or will sit at the hospital bedside of their child worrying and waiting in a serious situation. Even with the simplicity of Beth's injury I was still cringing at her pain, and I couldn't help but be aware that many serious injuries happen in moments just as quickly as Beth's small one did. Knowing that there were parents there that night fighting for the life of their child or dealing with life-altering injury made our circumstance somewhat laughable. I can't help but selfishly pray I will never be in that position, but I continue to pray for those who are. I can't imagine anything more heart wrenching.

Second, I tried to think of what we could learn from all of this. It was such a simple little accident it seemed grossly disproportionate to have ended up in an ambulance and a hospital. How is it that she managed to land on it just right so that it went right through the joint and required all the x-rays, anti-biotics, and sedation? As long as we're here can we gain something from this?

For Beth, I hope she learned how many people are behind her. When she called for help it came, in literally teams of people who stood by her bedside and cheered her on. Professionals, family, friends, neighbors, and a dozen Facebook comments are proof that she is very important to some very important people. Maybe now when her Dyslexia gets her down and it feels like the world is against her she can remember that she is loved, we are rooting for her, and help is on the way.

It's painfully obvious that life doesn't go according to textbooks. There is only so much value in knowing the right answer and checking off the list. The rest is all about being there for the ones you love, doing the best you can, and asking for help when you need it. With any luck at the end of the day we'll have learned something, like to be more grateful or how to move forward in our challenges, and that earns an "A" in my book.

In the ambulance:
Trying to be brave:
The rash (it was a deeper red in real life. Beth just saw this picture and asked, "What's that stuff all over her face? Oh, it's me."
A little pain killer goes a long way:
I have a picture of the needle in her toe but it was requested that I not post it online:) Thanks to everyone who commented, called, visited, and asked about Beth. It meant a lot to her and to us, and special thanks to Amy and Seth for keeping our other girls entertained until WAY past bedtime.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Blogger's Block

Something is wrong with me. Not seriously wrong, but odd for sure. For weeks now I have been walking around with ideas in my head of things I want to write about, photos I want to post, things I want to say. And yet as I sit at my computer and the screen goes on my mind goes blank and all the happy things I have to share are left unsaid another day. There's no true reason for it, other than that somehow the times when I have things to say, and the windows of time I have in which to say them don't seem to be corresponding. I will change this. I miss my blog, and the longer I put it off the more I'll miss what I didn't say because days are passing and the kids are growing and I'm starting to forget... Tonight won't be the night I bring my blog back to life, but I'll be back - soon.